Ben Stiller in “Meet the Parents”.

John Schneider in the Smallville episode “Red.”

Brad Pitt as Achilles in Troy. OK, Costco had it on the $6.99 rack so I had to get the DVD.  It’s actually not that bad as historic epics go.

Here’s our boy fresh from the fight:

And here he is just, well . . . .

And of course, the inevitable girding of loins. . . .

Eric Bana as Hector in Troy.

Orlando Bloom as Paris.  The Troy-Boy who stole the girl and started it all.